Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
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A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
Beer is the Danish national drink, and the Danish national weakness is another beer.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
I’m gaining weight the right way: I’m drinking beer.
Give a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime!
Beer’s intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it.
You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.